body positivity | Empowerment | Uncategorized

The importance of self love

August 10, 2016

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I feel like this topic is constantly talked about. Telling people they should “love themselves and their bodies” and “should be comfortable in their own skin.” But like a lot of other things, that’s easier said than done. How do we achieve self love, and how do we know when we’ve achieved self love?

I think it’s good to sometimes explore why it’s important that we love ourselves more. A lot of us have probably beaten ourselves up about one thing or another. Whether that’s regarding our appearance, a personality trait, or something we may have done to others. At the end of the day, cut yourself some slack. Perfection doesn’t exist, so why do we always strive for something that’s false anyway?

Be patient with yourself and use every day as a way of growing up and being better. In order to do this, you have to stop beating yourself up about everything you’re not, and look at everything you are.

For example, I don’t have skinny thighs, or big boobs, or the best face structure. Sure, I’d love all those things. I’d love to not have to turn my head to a weird angle so I can actually see because I’m partially sighted in one eye. I’d love to not make mistakes, and hurt the people I love the most. I’d love to actually be skilled at something and not be so insecure all the time because I have ‘nothing going for me.’ But when that all gets too much,  I look at the things I am. I sure as hell cherish everything that means the most to me, meaning that I am kind and compassionate to those I love the most. I actually like the colour of my hair at the moment (I seem to be going more ginger!) I actually like that my personality is centred around being a good person, and I eventually let myself off when I mess up. I actually like my ugly ass scar that runs halfway up my stomach because it makes me different. (Trust me, it is ugly).

It’s so easy to get caught up in all the pressure that surrounds us. As to what kind of human you should be. I hate being sensitive, because I get hurt easily. But being sensitive also means that I have my eyes so open to the world, and I know how to be so compassionate towards others so I don’t hurt people the way I’ve been hurt. See what I mean by turning once personal flaws about yourself into positives?

I’m not saying you’ll be confident all the time. I have times when I get so insecure that I would be quite happy not leaving the house for a week. I still compare myself to others, and I still beat myself up about not being ‘pretty enough’ or a ‘nice enough person.’ It’s okay to feel low sometimes; because it can help to come back with a stronger and more confident mindset.

By no means does loving yourself enough to be confident in yourself mean you’re ‘egotistical’ or ‘big headed’ either. Instead, it’s liberating finding who you are, and achieving everything you want to achieve. Take a moment to think about the things you love about yourself the most. People fail to realise a lot of the time that there is good and beauty in everyone and that includes yourself. Such a cliche phrase I know, but in the nearly 18 years I’ve lived, I’ve found that’s very true.

And why self love is so important? Because at the end of the day, you’re your own longest commitment. When you feel at your lowest, it’s you who has the ability to pick yourself back up again. I have begun to realise that beating myself over things that I can’t change aren’t important to me anymore, and I’m at a point in my life where I’ve never felt so happy. I changed once flaws, into things I love about myself. Thick thighs. Small boobs. Bad eyes- and anything else someone has criticised me for regarding my appearance. They’re all imperfections that I have accepted and are happy living with.

And my most overused personal favourite phrase regarding this topic; hashtag body posiiiii.

Love and happiness always,

xo, Becca

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  1. I think this is an important topic since we live in the social media age. It’s seems like beauty is definedby how good your makeup skills are ,no one really cares how you actually look. This sucks because you do feel a little presurred to wear makeup more often to look “good”. I think the first step of loving yourself is to admit that you don’t love yourself as much as you pretend you do. I see so many people who use makeupas a crutch ,and never really fix thier own problems. I’m a bit guilty of that myself. But at the end of the day you can’tfix a problem that doesn’t exist. Remember to be honest with yourself!

  2. Yes Becca! This is such a great post and everyone should read it! It’s so important to love yourself, but it’s definitely not as easy as it sounds! It takes time and stages but once you’re there it’s amazing! Ps; being different is DEFINITELY the way forward! Is lot are unique ;D thanks for sharing Xxx

  3. I love love love love this! It is about time people started to love themselves, warts and all haha! After 10 years of hating the way I look, it is much more lovely to love yourself rather than to hate yourself! Positivity all the way! Xx

    ayranarose.blogspot.com

    1. I totally agree!! I spent from the age of 13 to now (17) completely hating everything about myself. I don’t wanna go back to the stage of not being able to look at myself in the mirror because I hate myself so much- it’s totally unhealthy X

  4. Totally agree, it’s important to self love but achieving this can be easier said than done. Time and patience is a big thing plus what might work for some may not work for others. Great post. #BloggersPromoHour

    Jordanne // Thelifeofaglasgowgirl.co.uk

  5. Love this post defo feel like need to read this , great reminder we should all embrace are flaws and imperfections. Its about focusing on the positives rather than the negatives

    Pixie xx

  6. This is such a powerful post! You’re right it can be hard to love yourself, but what a good way to let people know it’s ok to embrace your flaws and it doesn’t make you a bad person
    Love love love this ❤️❤️❤️
    Amy xx
    andeastthesun.co.uk

  7. Love this! Totally agree with self love not being an overnight thing but the important thing to focus on is accepting your flaws – they are after all what makes you individual! So easy to get down about things but everybody has those days! x

  8. Thank you for such a positive post! Self-love is so important and learning how to make yourself feel better is a fab skill to have! I definitely have insecure days but there’s nothing a little Netflix, cosy blanket and hot chocolate can’t solve.

    Leanne | latteleanne.com xx

  9. Another FAB post! It’s really hard to work on self-love, but I do try most days. I have accepted my flaws and it’s always comforting to know that every person in the world has something that they do not like about themselves, but they still get on with it! There is a lot of pressure to look a certain way now, big boobs, big ass, tiny waist, perfect lips, great make up, the list goes on… I think in the long run it’s better to embrace what you have going on already, rather than dwell on what you don’t have!

    Em x
    http://www.ohfab.co.uk • lifestyle & design blog • for fab custom logo & blog header designs visit: http://www.etsy.com/uk/shop/ohfab

    1. Thank you so much lovely and I totally agree! Sometimes you get wrapped up in it all and think you’re the only one going through this and you get so bogged down by it. Unfortunately, there is so much pressure nowadays and it is quite upsetting. Thank you for the lovely feedback as always X

  10. As always, such an inspiring post! Of course in this day and age, we all tend to think and feel a certain way about ourselves. I had to learn the hard way to learn to love myself, how does one expect another to love you if you can’t love yourself. thabks for sharing!

    Jessica & James
    Foodandbaker.co.uk

  11. I’ve been slowly coming to terms with the idea of self-love. After suffering from low self-esteem for too long, I realised it was time to make a change. This post has actually inspired and spurred me on to share my problems with self-esteem and confidence on my blog so thanks Becca :-)!

  12. I love reading all these self love posts, I actually just wrote one just reguarding myself and how I am focusing on spending my time turning my life into something I love instead of just waiting for it to do it itself. I am trying to be more positive about things and my confidence is growing immensely and I just had to share it and read other peoples posts about it because I am just feeling so happy right now with everything.

  13. It find you very inspiring! This is not something discussed easily as so many people try to hide their imperfections instead of embracing them. That is what makes us different, not “flawed”, right? Thanks!
    MeUnfinished.com is my site, I would love to connect!
    🙂

  14. Usually I do not read post on blogs, however I wish to say that this write-up very pressured me to check out and do it! Your writing style has been surprised me. Thanks, quite nice article.

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