Empowerment | Me & my life | Uncategorized

I'm happy and confident being single

October 5, 2016


I have been meaning to write a post a bit like this for a while, about my whole view of being newly single, why I’m totally happy being single, and why being single has actually turned out to be extremely beneficial to me as a person.

Ever since I’ve been single, I feel like it’s helped me in finding myself and finding who I am. Obviously this can be done in relationships too, but the independent time to myself has been healing and probably the best thing that could’ve happened to me at this moment in time.

In fact, I have been told by some of the closest people in my life that I seem to have ‘blossomed’ in the past couple of months after becoming single. I seem to be a lot more confident, happy, empowered and liberated and that’s down to me deciding to take control of my life and do better.

I’m young, and I’m happy living my life at 18 and finding myself in the process. For someone who spends so much time putting others before her own health, it’s been extremely liberating for me to bounce back and be a developed product of the person I was 4 months ago. 

Overall, bring single has enabled me to concentrate on myself without having to think about another person whom I am in a relationship with. As much as I love being in relationships, being single equally has it’s benefits. I’ve had space to think, and to finally do everything that I’ve wanted to for so long.

This includes things I said that I would do whilst in my last relationship. I’m now taking control of my anxiety. I finally plucked up the courage to go to the doctors and seek help and am now waiting for my ‘cognitive behavioral therapy’ counselling sessions. I have been able to start travelling again which included going to Leeds for the #BloggersBlogAwards. I am going back to London in December and March and I am comfortable in myself in the first time in probably forever.

It’s given me time and space to think, reflect and regroup. As much as my friends are trying to be my ‘wing women’ and find me someone again… I personally don’t want it. I am the happiest in my own independent space and looking after myself and my health comes first and foremost. It’s helped me take a step back and think about things in depth. It’s completely slowed my hectic life down, and helped me control myself. It’s helped me become the person I’ve wanted to become for so long. Blossoming. 

I mean, Beyoncé wrote a whole song about being single and happy… so it can’t be that bad.

So hi, being single isn’t a bad thing, just like neither is being in a relationship. It is all about personal preference for the individual at that time. And for now? Honestly, my mingling days are back whilst looking after myself at the same time. I’m happy. I’m becoming healthier. I’m doing everything I promised I would do whilst I was in my last relationship- just doing it being single. And I am extremely liberated and empowered.

Love and happiness always,

xo, Becca

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  1. Yes! I was one of those people who was just never not single, so I definitely understand a lot of those – even though it can be a real downer at times as well. But I guess the point is those feelings are both fine 🙂

  2. I am so glad that you have become so much happier and I really enjoyed reading your insights on this! It can be hard for me to remember a lot of these things but I will definitely try harder x

  3. This post is amazing Becca! I think it is really important to feel just as happy and healthy as you are in a relationship as out of one and I think that your point about feeling empowered is absolutely great lovely!
    -Olivia xxx

  4. This is crazy because I did a post on my blog entitled, “Truth About Being Alone” which basically is like a reassurance to people so that they know it’s okay to be alone/single! Your post just reminds me so much of it lol you should check it out! Great post, it’s all about our mindsets towards it! 💗💗 keepingupwithMJ.com

  5. Good for you, girl. You’re happy and that’s all that matters, have fun doing all the wonderful things you plan to do. Loved your post!

    Sharon x

    rosieloveslife.blogspot.com

  6. Such an inspiring post! I’m at the age where most of my friends are settling down, getting engaged, starting a family etc but I feel as though i’m completely fine on my own! Thanks for sharing, you always have such wonderful, thoughtful posts xx

  7. Amazing post, Becca.

    “I mean, Beyoncé wrote a whole song about being single and happy… so it can’t be that bad.” I agree with that, haha!

    Keep up the good work!

  8. Awe I love this! I definitely agree with it too! I prefer being single until I know enough about myself to be in a relationship. The last relationship I was in, I left feeling completely lost and like I knew nothing about who I was outside of it. 18 is definitely time to explore who you are. I’m 21 and I’m still having fun doing just that. There’s so much stigma around single women which is nerve wrecking! This is time you need for yourself, to learn about yourself and to love yourself. Own it! x

  9. I absolutely loved this post! I’ve been single for a year and a half “officially” and it gets me down sometimes but I have learnt more about myself in this time than I ever have before. X

  10. Lovely post. I’m so happy for you that you’re taking control of your anxiety and being able to do more things! This is a brilliant message to promote!

    Hannah | alongsidehannah.blogspot.co.uk

  11. Good to see you’re so positive about being single! After my second boyfriend and I broke up I took this long break from dating (2 years almost) and it felt so great. I grew a lot as a person during that period, and by the time I met my current boyfriend I felt like it was ok to take the relationship seriously. If I had met him in the first months after my break up it would have never worked out.

    And good luck with the therapy! I’m in therapy myself (psychotherapy instead of CBT) and it’s so incredibly useful. Best decision I’ve ever made. I’m sure therapy will help you a lot as well <3

  12. Loved this post. I’m in a long term relationship myself but I have a dear friend who just divorced her high school sweetheart and I’ll have to send her this link. Thanks for sharing 💕

  13. I relate to this post so much right now. I was in a relationship that ended suddenly this year; I was devastated, but immediately knew I needed to focus on my own wellbeing. Concentrating solely on myself has allowed me to learn a lot about who I am – including receiving multiple MI diagnoses and having CBT sessions to reach recovery! Whilst it still gets to me, I feel happier in myself than I ever have – I guess everything happens for a reason! It’s so lovely to read you feel liberated and empowered 🙂

  14. Very inspirational and really wonderfully written. You are young, this is the time to do what you want. Single or not, finding yourself is the best thing ever and it’s so nice to know you’re happy doing it on your own! Thanks for sharing!

    Jessica
    Foodandbaker.co.uk

  15. I wish I had your insight when I was 18! Lovely mature post, you have plenty of time to find a person to share a relationship with. 👍🏼👍🏼👍🏼

  16. This is such an amazingly positive piece! It’s so wonderful to see you taking this as an opportunity to learn more about yourself and express your freedom, rather than letting it get you down. Good on you girly! xx

  17. I’m so pleased for you, this is such a happy and positive post! It’s amazing how you’ve managed to blossom as a person at a time that could really get you down. Well done you! 🙂 xx

  18. Good for you lovely 🙂 there is no rush about being in a relationship life is for living and enjoying whether you’re in a relationship or not! XX

  19. His is a truly lovely post x I’m so happy for you and it’s great to see how you’ve blossomed at a time which normally gets people down xx I loved this post it was really inspirational 🙂 xx

  20. This post has actually brightened my day! I’m so happy you’re feeling so empowered by this and that you’ve really blossomed! You’re completely right, your health and happiness comes first and it’s so great that you’re now able to really put yourself first and do all the things you want to do! It’s also reminded me how liberating it is to be single, so thank you for that!!

    Josie // JosieVictoriaa

  21. Beautiful post! You are so young, you will definitely enjoy being single, I have my first boyfriend when I was 20 (I’m 22 now lol, and it’s the same boy) but I really enjoyed my single life, you will have a great time now that you have done some insight.

    Instagram | Blog

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